The Hands of Time (29 page)

On the morning of our departure, Alec and I rode to the Abbey to say goodbye to Finn.  Robbie promised to look after his grave
,
and we had no doubt that he would be true to his word.  He idolized Finlay
,
and would look after him in death.  Alec had ordered a headstone from a mason in Plymouth
,
and this now marked the grave with just the name and the dates
,
as he didn
’
t want to say anything more for fear that Finn’s grave would be desecrated.  We walked back to the horses, hand in hand, having said our final goodbye and feeling Finn walking next to us in silent farewell. 

It was time to go.

Chapter 5
7

My experience of boats was limited to a cruise on the Circle Line around New York the night Michael proposed
,
and sailing a catamaran in the Florida Keys, so the tedium of life aboard the
Morning Star
came as a surprise.  Once we were in the open sea
,
the days settled into a routine which was broken only by meals and sleep.   Alec and I shared the cabin of the fi
r
st mate, who grudgingly surrendered it to us and moved below decks to sleep with the rest of the sailors in a hammock attached to the ceiling and only a few inches away from the next man
.  T
he small cabin next to us was allocated to Bridget and Finn.  Our cabin had two narrow berths bolted to the floor and a small table.  There was no room for Finn
,
and I was afraid to take him into bed with me for fear of rolling over him in my sleep
,
lulled into oblivion by the rolling motion of the ship. 

Bridget and Finn slept in hammocks suspended from the ceiling of their cabin
,
and I loved seeing Finn’s little body nestled into the hammock as it swayed to and fro
,
rocking the baby to sleep.  The combination of bracing sea air and the constant motion
,
finally got him to sleep through the night despite teething
,
and I was thankful for that, as I am sure was Bridget. 

The sailors were busy from morning
till
night, but there wasn’t much for Bridget and
I
to do.  We strolled on the deck with Finn when possible
,
and tried to sew in our
cabins when the sea was rough or it rained.  Mealtimes didn
’
t provide any relief from the routine
,
since we mostly ate porridge or hard biscuits with ale for breakfast
,
and some sort of salt pork or salt beef stew for supper.  Occasionally
,
there was salt cod to break up the monotony.  I inwardly groaned every time I came into the mess hall
,
revolted by the unappetizing food and longing for a vegetable or a fruit. 

The voyage to
America
would take anywhere from two to three months
,
depending on the weather
,
and we were only three weeks into it, so I tried not to dwell on the discomforts and not complain too much to Alec.  There wasn’t much he could do anyway. 

Occasionally I caught glimpses of the
Misty Dawn
or
Lady Violet
on the horizon.  We had all left Plymouth at the same time, but sometimes we were in the lead
,
and other times I saw them passing us in the distance
;
the proud breasts of the figurehead pointing straight ahead to America
,
or the gun ports of
Misty Dawn
gaping like black holes in the early hours of the morning.  I tried not to focus too much on the fact that there were four cannons on each side of the ship
,
and they were undoubtedly there for a reason.  Alec had assured me that being attacked by pirates was unlikely
,
and I chose to believe him.  Anyway, I knew that all the sailors were armed
,
and there were several kegs of gunpowder
and cannon balls
in the cargo hold in case of a
n
attack. 

Most days
,
the ocean was calm
,
the azure waters
sparkling
in the summer sunshine as if someone tossed a million diamonds onto the surface.  The sky was a cloudless
blue that blended with the water at the horizon
,
making it impossible to distinguish where sky ended and ocean began.  I tried not to think of the fact that we were surrounded by an unbroken body of water
,
with not an island or welcoming port anywhere for a thousand miles.  We were like a speck of sand on a vast beach, small and insignificant, existing in a microcosm of our wooden universe. 

I came up on deck with Bridget and Finn to enjoy a little fresh air before the midday meal.  Judging from the smell emanating from the galley, it was to be salt cod
,
and I swallowed back a wave of disgust, resolving to skip lunch.  Salt cod was definitively not a favorite of mine.  Maybe I would just ask cook for a biscuit and a cup of tea, to hold me over till supper.  I wasn’t really hungry, but I was still nursing Finn
,
and needed to eat throughout the day to keep up the supply of milk.  I saw Alec across the deck and he gave me a wicked smile, followed by a slight shifting of the eyes toward the stairs to the cabins below.  He made some comment to the
c
aptain
,
and casually detached himself from the cluster of sailors and strolled toward me.  I handed Finn over to Bridget, who gave me a knowing look, and made for the stairs, beating Alec by a few moments. 

He came into the cabin right behind me and pulled me against him, sliding his hand into my bodice and cupping my breast
,
while his teeth gently bit my earlobe.  I allowed myself to lean against him, enjoying the solid feel of his body, and moved my hips suggestively
,
getting an instant response.  Alec walked me toward the table, and pushed me over, bunching up my skirts at the waist and using his knee to push my legs apart.  I blushed furiously thinking of the view from his end
,
and grabbed onto the table as the full
force of his onslaught nearly caught me off-balance.  I closed my eyes, giving myself up to the feel of him inside me, as Alec took the name of the Lord in vain very loudly and leaned over me, kissing the side of my face and jokingly thanking me for being such a dutiful and obedient wife.  He was just tying his laces, when there was a knock on the door and Will, the cabin boy, called out, “Mr. Alec,
s
ir, you are wanted on deck by the
c
aptain.”

“No rest for the weary,” Alec sighed
,
watching me adjust my skirts and tuck my breasts back into the bodice of my gown.  He grabbed onto the table as the deck rolled beneath his feet
,
and caught me with the other arm, preventing me from falling onto the berth.  “The sea is getting rough,” he said as he kissed me soundly
,
and left the cabin to see to the
c
aptain.  I checked my appearance and followed him up on deck.  We
’
d only been down below a short while, but I could instantly see that the conditions had changed.  The sky was turning from blue to pewter
,
and there were huge, black clouds on the horizon, already being split by jagged steaks of lightning.  The waters that were calm just half an hour ago
,
were beginning to churn and roil beneath the ship; the waves swelling to alarming heights and sending spray overboard, soaking anyone who happened to be standing nearby. 

“Barometer is falling, Mr. Whitfield,” the
c
aptain said as Alec approached.  “I am afraid a great storm is coming.”  I looked up at the numerous figures climbing the rigging to collapse the sails
,
and furl them up against the gathering strength of the wind.  My hair was whipping into my face
,
the first drops of
rain
instantly soaking the thin fabric of my gown.

“Valerie, take Bridget and the baby and get down below,” Alec yelled over the wind.   “Stay down there and
do not
come up until I come to get you.”  I scooped up Finn out of Bridget’s arms and made my way to our cabin.  The floor was heaving and groaning underneath my feet
,
and I climbed into the berth, loosening my bodice and giving suck to the baby.  I knew it would get worse
,
and I wanted him fed and changed before I wrapped him up into several blankets
,
to cushion him against any bumps he might sustain. 

Finlay grabbed my breast with his little, pudgy hands and latched on, hungry as usual.  Bridget looked out of the porthole and crossed herself.  The afternoon sky was nearly black now
.  T
hunder boomed outside, followed by flashes of lightning that illuminated the cabin for a few moments
,
before dark water crashed against the hull
,
obliterating the sky.  The rain had turned into a torrential downpour, beating against the porthole whenever it wasn’t submerged under water.

The ship rocked so violently that we could no longer keep our balance
.  We
sat huddled on the berth with Finn between us, enjoying the rocking
,
and laughing, exposing his swollen gums and two teeth.  Bridget’s face was white as a sheet
,
as
she silently prayed, crossing herself periodically.  I heard the pounding of feet above us as the men on deck tried to fight the elements and keep the ship steady.  I prayed that Alec was all right
,
and crossed myself as well, just in case.  A torrent of seawater came crashing through the opening above and poured into the cabin, covering the floor with a few inches of water. 
Bridget leaped to her feet and bolted the door, trying to keep the water out in vain. 

There was barely any light inside the cabin
, but
we didn’t even bother trying to light a candle.  We could just see each other in the shadows
,
and I picked up Finn and took Bridget’s cold hand in my own, looking for comfort.  We held on to each other, trying to brace our feet on the floor
,
as the ship was tossed on the monstrous waves
;
making it impossible not to be slammed against the wooden walls of the cabin.  I held Finn to my chest tightly, causing him to cry out in discomfort
,
as I tried to keep him from being knocked from my arms and tossed about the cabin like a rag doll. 

There were sounds of wood splintering from above
,
and I suddenly remembered watching some pirate movie with Lou
where
the
c
aptain yell
ed
, “Shiver me timbers!”  Now I understood what he meant.  The timber was not only shivering around us
;
it was moaning and groaning and begging for mercy as wave after wave pounded the hull, rocking the ship hard enough to turn it
nearly
on its side.  I heard screaming from above
,
and felt my heart grow cold as I made out the words.  “Man overboard.”  Would they even attempt a rescue
,
or just let the poor sod drown in the roiling sea with no chance of getting help? 

I clutched Finn and prayed for Alec.  I wished he would come down and tell us what was happening, but he had more important things to do.  Our passionate interlude from before seemed like a distant memory
,
lost in the terror of the storm.  I felt as if my insides were being turned inside out
,
and pushed Finn into Bridget’s arms as I
finally lost the battle with my stomach and emptied out its contents on the wet floor.

I had no idea how much time had passed by the time the rocking seemed to ease a little
,
and the sky outside the porthole became visible again.  I could see the stars twinkling as the clouds scurried across the gibbous moon, the storm having moved on.  I could still hear the thunder in the distance, but we were obviously out of the eye of the storm. 

I held on to the walls as I carefully opened the door of the cabin and climbed very
cautiously
up on deck.   There were broken pieces of wood littering the deck
,
and everything was soaked and dripping with seawater.  The sailors looked exhausted and battered
,
as my eyes searched for my husband.  Alec was nowhere to be seen
,
and my heart ran cold with worry until I finally saw his tall figure climbing down from the rigging, a spyglass in his hand.  He looked drained
,
his hair dripping wet as he came toward me.