WhatHeDemands (domination erotica) (5 page)

Jordan

Reacting out of pure instinct, I flipped over on my stomach
and dove beneath the surface, kicking hard to propel myself as far away from
him as I could.

I was nude. He’d seen me.

Who knew what else he’d seen.

Had he been standing there the whole time? Watching?

My face was burning when I surfaced. My gaze went first to
Shane. He was wrapping a white towel around his lower body. I couldn’t tell if
he was aware of Jordan being there, watching us, or not.

I decided I’d let him know.

“Jordan,” I said as I wrapped one arm around my breasts,
hiding them from his view. Then, to Shane, I said, “May I please have a towel?”

Shane glanced at Jordan but didn’t seem surprised to see
him. “Sure.” He pulled one off the rack next to him and strolled toward me.

I gave him a wide eyed look as he held it open for me.
Evidently I was going to have to stand nude in front of this stranger. But only
for a second.

Moving quickly, I pushed out of the pool and stepped into
the soft towel. Thankfully, it was large, bigger than a bath towel. It covered
me from chest to knee.

Still feeling ashamed, as if I’d been caught doing something
I shouldn’t have, I glanced at Jordan. He gave me some kind of look I couldn’t
read then wandered over to the table where we’d eaten dinner and sat.

“I think he saw us,” I whispered to Shane.

Shane nodded. “Come with me. We need to talk.”

Intrigued, and hoping I’d finally find out why he’d seemed
so upset earlier, I followed him inside. We went to a bedroom, his I assumed.
Sitting patiently on a small chaise at the foot of the bed, I watched him strip
out of his wet shirt and pull on a clean, dry pair of shorts and a t-shirt.

Finally, he sat beside me.

And said…nothing.

I waited.

For a minute. Two. Three.

Shane jammed his fingers through his wet hair. Looking down
at the gleaming tile floor, he said, “He’s expecting to have sex with you.”

My head was spinning. Whirling. Swooping. It wasn’t a good
feeling. Not at all. I felt as if my lungs were concrete. They wouldn’t expand.
They wouldn’t fill with air.

Shane was still sitting next to me, staring down at the
floor. He’d just delivered one of the biggest shocks of my life, and he didn’t
have the guts to look me in the eye?

Fury quickly replaced the shock, making my heart pound hard
in my chest. “What the hell are you talking about, Shane?”

“It’s complicated.”

“I don’t care what it is. I’m not a whore.”

“I know.”

“I don’t sleep with just anyone.”

“I know that too.”

I stood up. I stomped away, getting as far as the door.
Pivoting, I asked, “When you told me I was going to be your submissive, was
this part of the deal?”

“Y--yes.”

What the hell? What else hasn’t he told me? “You didn’t tell
me that. If you had, I might have…” What? What would I have said? Would I have
walked away? Or would I have been skeptical, thinking he wouldn’t actually make
me have sex with someone I didn’t know?

Regardless, he didn’t give me the chance to make that
choice.

That wasn’t right.

It was absolutely reprehensible. And just plain shitty.

“I didn’t mention it yet because Jordan is the only one I
share with. I didn’t expect you to meet him so soon.”

“
So soon?
In other words, you figured you had time to
charm me and seduce me and get me ready.”

“Not exactly.”

I didn’t like that response. It suggested he had thought
something along those lines. I’d never felt dirty after sex before. Now I did.
Really dirty. And used. “I want to go home. Now.”

“It’ll take some time to get the plane back.”

“I don’t care.” Feeling a rush of tears coming, I ran to my
room and slammed the door. I locked it too. Then I sat on my bed and had a good
cry.

Why did he do this to me? Why? I wasn’t some prostitute, who
didn’t mind being swapped and used and shared for a price. I was an independent
woman with healthy self-respect. I choose my partners carefully. I didn’t sleep
around.

Then again, I had known from the start that Shane was into
some really kinky stuff. He’d been upfront about that much.

And he’d tried to warn me off.

Should I have seen this coming? Was I too dazzled by the
money, the great sex, and his drop dead good looks to see what was really
there?

No. No! I wasn’t going to blame myself. The fact was I was
new. Shane was aware of that. It was his responsibility to inform me.

He’d intentionally kept it from me.

What else wasn’t he telling me?

The bottom line was I couldn’t trust him. And if I couldn’t
trust him, how could I continue to see him?

I was maybe twenty minutes into my pity-party when I heard a
knock on my door. It had to be Shane. I didn’t want to talk to him. I didn’t
want to see him. But, dammit, I wanted another chance to make him know how
insulted and hurt I was.

I yanked open the door to reveal a contrite looking Shane.

“The plane will be here in a couple of hours. You’re free to
leave then if you want. But I’d like the chance to explain—“

“What’s there to explain, Shane? That you brought me here to
loan to your friend? How often do you do that, huh? Is this your little dirty
secret? Is this a haven or is it a place where you can have orgies and not be
found out?”

Shane’s face paled a little but he didn’t interrupt. I
ranted for at least another ten minutes, unloading all my fury on him until I’d
run out of words.

Then he motioned for me to sit on the bed.

Just because I was in the mood to defy him, I crossed my
arms over my chest and snapped, “No, thanks. I think I’ll stand.”

“Suit yourself.” Shane sat. Elbows on his knees, he shoved
his fingers through his hair and stared down at the stupid floor for a few
minutes. “Contrary to what you think, I did not bring you here to share with anyone.
I didn’t know Jordan would be here. If I had, I would have taken you somewhere
else. I wanted to spend some time with you. Alone. In private.” He lifted his
eyes to mine. “You asked me why I was so tense. Now you know. Jordan’s being here completely threw a wrench in my plans and complicated things.”

“It sure did.” Having run out of fury after that ugly rant,
I leaned to the right, shouldering the wall, arms still crossed over my chest.

“I was trying to explain earlier, but you didn’t give me a
chance to finish.”

Had I cut him off? Did I react without having all the facts?
A part of me hoped there was more to this. I wanted to hear something that made
it all less…ugly. “I’m sorry if I jumped the gun. But you can’t blame me, can
you? I mean, I’m the newbie here. I trusted you to tell me what is going on.
And then, out of the blue you tell me a man I don’t know is expecting to have
sex with me.
Expecting
. That freaked me out.”

“Of course it did. You’re not like the other submissives.”

Other submissives. It seemed I had been right about one
thing. He did bring women here. And they shared them, swapped them, did God
only knew with them.

I held back a shudder. “Are there others? Now?”

“There have been,” he admitted.

“Recently?”

He nodded.

I needed some time to think about this. I couldn’t do that
here.

“Shane, this is a lot for me to absorb. I thought I could
handle it, but maybe I can’t. Maybe it’s not enough to just be your submissive.”

“I understand.” His expression completely unreadable, he
nodded.

“I’m sorry.”

“There’s no reason to apologize. I knew we’d eventually hit
an impasse. That was why I’d discouraged it from the beginning.” He sighed,
looked at me, dark shadows in his eyes. “But a part of me wanted it to work.
Badly.”

“Me too.”

I plopped on my butt on the bed. “If I decide…if I can’t see
you again. I hope you won’t disappear for another ten years,” I said.

“Not if you don’t want me to.”

I blinked once, twice. My nose was burning. Dammit, I was
going to cry. My insides were twisting up into knots, and it hurt. A lot. More
than it should, considering how brief this thing with Shane had been.

Shane placed a hand on my knee, gave it a little squeeze.
“You’re better off without me.”

He left.

God, what an awful thing to say about himself. I was better
off without him. It was as if he didn’t deserve to be cared about, to have a real
relationship, one that was committed and genuine and loving.

That was, I realized, what I wanted to have with him. What I
had expected to have with him. Even though he’d made it clear from the
beginning that it wasn’t going to happen.

My hands shaking slightly, I went to the closet and pulled
out my empty suitcase. Since I’d packed for only a weekend, it didn’t take me
long to put everything back in my suitcase. Not up to facing Shane or Jordan, I
spent the rest of the time in my room, lounging on the bed and channel surfing
on the stupid television hanging on the wall. Nothing appealed. Time dragged. I
was so relieved when there was a knock on my door, and Shane called through it,
“The boat’s here to take you back to Antigua.”

I opened the door, and felt a warm rush. It was so unfair
that this had to end already. Shane and I did have some insane chemistry. I’d
never felt like that with another man, like I couldn’t get close enough to him,
couldn’t touch him enough, couldn’t kiss him enough.

“Have a safe trip,” he said as he moved aside to let me
pass.

I stepped out of the room, set the suitcase on the floor and
stared at him. Then, acting out of pure impulse, I threw my arms around his
neck and hugged him. My body melted immediately. My nose and eyes started
burning. And when he enclosed me in his embrace, a sob ripped up my throat. I
clung to him, wondering if I would find the strength to leave.

His hands glided down my back, coming to rest on my waist.
He pushed, gently, easing me away. “We’d better get you on that boat.”

Sniffling, I nodded.

When I passed Jordan, who was sitting in the living room, I
made eye contact but said nothing to him. He intimidated me, now that I knew
what he’d been thinking. When I saw something flicker across his face, I jerked
my gaze away and followed Shane outside, down the steps and to the dock. He
helped me onto the boat. I stood there, hands gripping the railing, as the
engines started purring and we drifted out to sea. Shane remained on the dock,
watching me, looking sad and alone.

It sure didn’t look like the domination and submission thing
was working for Shane any more than it was working for me. Why couldn’t he give
it up? Why couldn’t he just tell Jordan to go find his own fucking submissive?

Why?

* * * * *

“What happened?” Jill asked me the minute I was in her car.
She didn’t even give me the chance to buckle my seatbelt.

“I don’t know if I’m ready to talk about it yet.”

“Oh, hun. That bad?”

A horn honked behind us, and she flipped the driver the
bird, shifted into drive, and hit the gas. “Effing jerk. He just couldn’t wait
another second. One freaking second.” She steered her car around a hotel
shuttle and zoomed toward the freeway. “Where did you go?”

“Antigua.”

“Antigua? It must’ve been really bad, if you had to leave
early.”

“It was.”

Jill didn’t say another word. Not until I was home. She
helped me drag my stuff into the condo.

Inside my living room, I gave her what was probably the
lamest smile ever. “Thanks for coming to pick me up.” I blinked. I blinked again.
Dammit, my eyes were watering.

Jill pulled me into a hug, ran her hand down the back of my
hair. “The asshole doesn’t deserve you.”

“It wasn’t so much that he was an asshole.”

Jill gave me another squeeze then dragged me toward the
couch. “Tell me.”

I flopped onto the couch. “It’s not that he’s a jerk. It’s
that…he and I live in different worlds. And I’m not just talking about his
money. He’s insanely rich. We flew in a private jet. And the house. Ohmygod. On
the shore, ocean views from practically every room. An infinity pool. I could
handle all that, I think. I mean, it wasn’t like I’ve met his friends yet. I
take that back. I met one. He was the reason why I left.”

“Why? Did he call you a gold digger?”

“No. He expected Shane to share me.”

Jill’s eyeballs got huge. “Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah. Evidently, he and Shane do a lot of that, sharing
partners. And they haven’t stopped. I’m just another submissive to them. One of
many.” I sighed. “You see, I might have been able to learn to live in his
gilded world of wealth. But it was that world of domination and submission I
don’t understand. I don’t want to understand it. It’s all just too…weird for
me. I thought I understood it. I was wrong.”

“It would be too weird for me too.” Jill set her hand on
mine. “You did the right thing. I mean, I know you were having fun with Shane,
and that you care for him. You’ve known him since you were a kid. But cutting
it off now, before there are any real feelings there is best.”

Real feelings. I’d had real feelings for Shane since I was
twelve. “I’m sure you’re right.” I dropped my chin in my hands. “But dammit,
this sucks.”

“I know.” She smoothed her hand up and down my back then
wrapped her arm around my shoulder and pulled me toward her, giving me a little
shake. “I’m here, sweetie.”

“Thanks. You’re the best.”

“Hey, considering how many times you’ve been there for me,
it’s the least I could do.”

My phone rang, and my heart did a little jerk in my chest. I
checked the number.

“It’s him,” I said.

“Give that to me.” Jill grabbed the phone from me and hit
the button to ignore the call. “Right now, you’re vulnerable. Talking to him
would be a mistake.”