Second Nature (5 page)

Tears threatened but I refused to let them
even shine in my eyes. After all we had been through together, was
there nothing between us? Was I hopelessly in love with a man who
wanted nothing to do with me? He looked at me, and that warm golden
glow I had come to recognize as his love washed over me. “Do you
exist to contradict yourself?” I asked in exasperation.

“What do you want from me, Amelia? You want
me to tell you I love you. I do! Is that enough? No, it’s not! I’m
not ready to be settled, to be the happy little Gaia husband and
make little Gaia babies!”

“I never asked for that.” My voice wavered,
but I had to get the words out. “All I asked was to work it out
together. I love you, Nate, but right now, I don’t like you very
much. Are you trying to hurt me?”

“You know I wouldn’t do that.” His eyes went
wide in indignation.

“How am I supposed to know, Nate?” My voice
was dangerously quiet. He gaped at me, his attitude suggesting I
was being deliberately obstinate. Nevertheless, I had to get a few
things off my chest. “You abandoned me. You stuck around long
enough to get my hopes up, then you disappeared. Every time you
reappeared, it was with an attitude like you were doing me a favor.
And now because I’m over it, I’m the bad guy?”

He closed the distance between us, his face
inches from mine as he yelled. “I’m not the one who brought other
people into it.” He pointed at his eye as if it were my fault.

I recoiled, appalled and furious. “You know
as well as I do what happened wasn’t my fault. You knew Xander was
over protective. He was your friend, and you should know his
temper. All I did was explain to him why I was upset. Hell, if it
weren’t for me, I’m not sure he would have retained enough calm to
keep you alive!”

He looked ashamed for a minute, but the
anger snowballed out of control, bouncing back and forth as we each
fed into it. He switched tactics, moving faster than a striking
cobra. “And here we go with the ‘Poor Amelia Show.’ Oh poor me, my
parents are dead. Poor me, they didn’t explain everything. Guess,
what, princess, the world doesn’t revolve around you. My parents
died long before yours, and I never used it as an excuse. And they
never told me shit. You have to be one of the most selfish people I
have ever met. Do you ever think about anyone but yourself?”

Tears filled my eyes. I wasn’t going to let
him hurt me and get away with it. I would give as good as I got.
“I’m the selfish one? I’m not the one who isn’t man enough to own
up to my mistakes. Who kissed whom, Nate? Who got us into this
mess!”

By this time, we were screaming and other
people were starting to notice. Nate grabbed my arm and dragged me
toward the trees. I tried to wrench myself away, but he tightened
his grip. “Let me go, Nate, you’re hurting me!” He ignored me and
didn’t release me until we were hidden from view on a small deer
trail.

“Kissing you that day was the biggest
mistake I ever made. If there was one thing in my life I would do
over, that’s what it would be. Then I wouldn’t be saddled with you
whining inside my head all the time.”

“You arrogant little jerk! I can’t believe
you!” I turned away from him, crossing my arms under my breasts and
willing myself not to cry. I walled myself off from him, refusing
to show how hurt I was.

“God, I hate you when you act like
this!”

Any internal walls I had dropped as I spun
back to face him, eyes wide and hot tears streaking my face. I’d
never been more appalled, angry, hurt, sad…. There were so many
emotions running through me I couldn’t think, let alone react.

Nate tried to back pedal, but it was too
late. I turned and stalked to my car without saying a word. He
chased after me, offering apologies, swearing he didn’t mean it.
His words were hollow though, because I had felt the truth in what
he said. Nate hated me. Nothing could have prepared me for
that.

Without saying a word to him, I climbed into
my car. He tried to grab my door and nearly got his fingers smashed
for his trouble. He yanked them away just in time. I threw the car
into reverse without looking, then slammed on the brake and put it
into drive. When I glance in the rearview mirror, he was scrubbing
his forehead with his hand. Then he was out of sight. I was proud
of the fact I made it all the way home and up to me room before the
body shaking sobs took over.

THE HOUSE WAS filled with the delicious
smell of chicken when I stirred from my room. Following my nose, I
found Sariah setting the table with four places. I silently got
silverware and helped. She smiled at me but looked harried. I’d
never seen my sister stressed.

“Who’s coming to dinner?”

Sariah gave me a tight smile and fussed with
Mom’s carved wooden napkin rings. “A guy I met him at the
library.”

Sariah spent a lot of time at the library.
Many of them across the country have secret stashes of Otherworld
knowledge, and Greensboro is one of the best. My sister was tight
lipped about whatever she researched, but we had been in Greensboro
for about ten months, and she’d spent most her time there.

“You met a guy at the library?” I asked, my
eyebrows shooting up. It wasn’t exactly surprising my sister had
met a guy, she was a Succubus after all, but the kind of guys you
met at the library weren’t exactly her type. I was still having
trouble reconciling this new person with the sister I always
thought I had. I’d never been close to Sariah, and it was only near
the end of my old life I realized how protective of me she was. The
problem was she was too empathetic, and because of it, she had to
block herself off from the world which made her seem stoic. It had
taken me forever to learn to read her. Add to the mix, the ability
to turn off her own emotions— something she had to do frequently
while trying to cope with our parent’s death—and it took all the
time we’d spent together in the last year for me to get to know
her.

“Look, I know things aren’t going well for
you, Lia, but I really like this guy. There’s something…” She
smiled almost unaware as her mind turned to the mystery man. I
don’t even think she realized she drifted off in midsentence. About
to give her a hard time about it, I was interrupted by a car
pulling up outside. Leaving her to do her best whirlwind impression
in the dining room, I opened the door. I don’t know what I
expected, but what I saw wasn’t it.

The man on our doorstep had longish dark
hair in soft curls to his collar. He wore thick black glasses over
his golden hazel eyes. His bright red t-shirt declared,
Obey
gravity. It’s the law
. He wore jeans with what appeared to be
an ink stain on the knee and an old worn-out pair of sneakers.
Basically, he was a geek. A kind of cute geek, but still a geek. He
was as far from Sariah’s type as anyone I’d ever seen.

Shaking myself, I stepped back and motioned
for him to come in. This close I could feel his humanity, which
made sense. My sister fed on sexual energy, but it only worked on
human men. “I’m so sorry. I swear my mother taught me better. I’m
Amelia, Sariah’s little sister.”

“Russell. Russell Kimble.” He shook my hand.
His firm grip surprised me. This was the kind of geek I thought
only existed on TV, hot and self-assured.

“What do you do, Russell?”

“I’m the Librarian, actually.” The way he
said it, I could hear the capital letter. I didn’t want to expose
my ignorance so I widened my eyes and gave a knowing nod. He
laughed, and I had to admit his perfect white teeth made for a
beautiful smile. “Don’t worry, Sariah told me you’re still pretty
new to all of this. The job of The Librarian is hereditary. I have
an innate gift that makes me immune to most powers.”

I nodded, silently wondering if he knew
about Sariah. Were her abilities something he was immune to? I felt
my cheeks heat. Unable to speak, I led Russell into the kitchen, my
mind still wandering aimlessly. Sariah hissed at me between her
teeth, her eyes speaking volumes that this just wasn't another guy.
I needed to get it together now or deal with her later. I flushed
again and excused myself to the fridge. I grabbed the apple cider
and three cans of Coke, pouring soda for everyone but myself. As I
poured the second one, Russell cleared his throat. I turned and
raised my brows at him in the universal symbol for
I’m
listening
.

“I’ll actually take some of that apple
cider, if it’s all right.” I nodded and poured his drink.

We sat down at the table, and I noticed my
brother’s absence with raised brows. It wasn’t like Xander to skip
a meal. Sariah shrugged trying to look nonchalant. But just before
she pasted a smile on her face, her brow puckered with worry.

We ate dinner with light banter. Russell
seemed to have been part of our family for years, lightly teasing
Sariah about the salad. I wondered about the two of them. I started
to get a sneaking suspicion he wasn’t as human as he seemed to be.
I couldn’t sense anything Otherworldly about him, but some things
just didn’t sit right with me. He avoided the store bought
dressings Sariah was fond of and opted for my organic vinegar and
oil dressing. There was something just a little off about him, and
I was determined to figure it out.

Sariah and Russell headed into the living
room as I cleared the table. I kept watching out the window,
waiting for Xander to pull into the drive. With the dishwasher
loaded, I washed up the other dishes. Once the table and stove were
clean, I stood by the window looking out at the setting sun.

I hurried through the living room where
Sariah and Russell sat with their knees almost touching talking
animatedly. They didn’t even notice me slip past and upstairs. My
room was my sanctuary, decorated in sea moss green and gold. A
canopy bed draped with warm toned sheers sat against on wall. I
headed straight for my favorite feature of the room, the padded
window seat. Enclosed by two bookshelves, layers of sheer curtains
were artfully arranged to make it look almost like the inside of a
tent. With the windows open, I could feel the muggy night air on my
face, making it the perfect place to hide away with a book.

I tried to read, but I kept watching the
darkness for headlights. The hour got later and later but still no
Xander. Dylan texted me, and we chatted back and forth a little,
but I couldn’t focus and eventually told him I had to go. After a
couple of hours, I came out of my room and back to the living room.
Sariah was saying goodnight to Russell, so I flopped down on the
couch and waited for her to be done. She gave him a chaste kiss,
her hand lingering on his arm before he turned away. It was very
sweet and completely shocking.

“Who are you, and where’s my real sister?” I
asked after she shut the door and leaned against it with a small
dreamy smile.

Sariah shot me a withering look as she
walked back over to the sofa and threw a pillow at me. I squealed
and before I knew it, there was an all-out pillow fight going. I
don’t think I gave as good as I got, but we were all smiles and
giggles by the time we collapsed on the sofa. She put her arm
around my shoulder and tugged me close, and I tucked my head under
her chin. Sweet moments of closeness with my sister were rare, and
I didn’t want to ruin this for anything, no matter how much I
wanted to razz her about Russell.

We sat on the sofa laughing and reminiscing,
all our sentences starting with “Do you remember…” or “Oh, wasn’t
it funny when…”

Sariah’s eyes strayed to the window more
than once, and finally, the worry began to get the better of me
too. The clock declared it was eleven with soft chimes, and the
butterflies in my stomach grew to the size of hawks. Where was
Xander? I pulled out my cell phone and checked it, but there were
no messages. Xander wasn’t the type to just go off and not tell us.
Tears filled my eyes at the thought of something happening to him.
Sariah paced the floor, occasionally walking over to gaze out the
window at the still empty driveway.

I couldn’t take it anymore. My mouth set in
a hard line, and I grabbed my keys and headed to my car. Sariah ran
after me. I tried to ignore her since I thought she would try to
stop me, but she caught my arm and tugged me toward her Mercedes
SUV. We climbed in and began winding through all the streets of
Greensboro looking for our brother’s Mustang.

We found it parked on a deserted street not
far from downtown, the top down and keys in the ignition. The block
was lined with eclectic stores and trendy restaurants, but they
were all closed at this hour. I bit my lip hard enough to draw
blood as we inspected the car. Aside from the fact that Xander
would never abandon his baby with the top down or the keys in it,
there was no sign of anything. We walked up and down the block,
looking in all the business windows but seeing nothing.