Nerd Haiku (5 page)

Desktop ruled by a

fully articulated

Cobra Commander.

Professional with

an obscure quote at the end.

My email footer.

Matthew Broderick,

global thermonuclear

war. Career path set.

00110101

00110111

(Binary Haiku)

You need IT help?

OK, one question for you:

Did you turn it on?

No login needed,

so what I really mean is

You. Shall. Not. Password!

Skynet stock will climb

before plummeting along

with humanity.

Toasters were harmless.

Battlestar Galactica

changed all that for me.

Learned how to drive a

stick and customize just to

steer Optimus Prime.

Starship
Enterprise,

the
Millennium Falcon
.

I have . . . a Honda.

A hybrid car, hmm?

Does it come loaded with a

flux capacitor?

The Go-Bots are the

Hydrox to the Transformers'

Oreo cookies.

Harley Davidson

could get nerds on a hog with

a Tron Light Cycle.

Sure, he can fix a

flat, but can he speak Elvish?

I didn't think so.

Hippocratic Oath,

yet Kaylee's feelings were hurt.

Doctor Simon Tam.

Who needs a degree?

All you need are snacks and a

Mystery Machine.

Your plan went awry.

You forgot to account for

us meddling kids. Zoinks!

Saturday mornings

I wake up early to play

with my Super Friends.

I can watch Tweety

again and again. But the

Raven? Nevermore.

Spidey, Lucius, and

The Electric Company

taught me how to spell.

Searching for a word

that will bring you to your knees.

Scrabble tournament.

Forgot
vacuum
has

two
u
s. Space and spelling bee

judges abhor me.

In retrospect, six

was just a little young to

see
The Exorcist.

The kids may not care,

but you and I both know that

Han shot Greedo first.