Falafel Jones - The Kewpie Killer (30 page)

Ray’s files also included emails, sales brochures, slide show presentations and other documents which appeared work related and had nothing to do with his finances.

Mariel came into the office. “I’m going to the library to work on my paper.” A former Spanish teacher, she enrolled in a college class on Don Quixote for “fun”.

“I’m going to go to the library and then I’m going to go the Starbucks on campus or maybe I’ll go to the Starbucks and then to the library. I’ll decide when I get there. Te amo.” She leaned over and kissed me goodbye.

She had read that book at least three times, once in English, once in Spanish and once in Old Spanish. I guessed she couldn’t get her fill of it. I told her I loved her too and she left.

I went back to work and wrote a report detailing Ray’s finances. It included the bank names, account numbers and passwords for five different money market accounts, two checking accounts and an online investment account. The money market account records listed Ray’s deposits.

I found one recurring amount, direct deposit of his paycheck. For a short period, starting recently, another recurring amount was a series of cash deposits. I couldn’t find the source, but it was the same amount each week, indicating the possibility of an additional source of income. Other sporadic deposits were wire transfers of varying amounts.

Ed would need a copy of the disk as well as the report, but there was more data than would fit on a DVD. If I were working on a regular basis, I would have had a spare hard drive to hold everything. Since I wasn’t, I didn’t.

However, I did have an almost empty 120 Gb iPod. I decided to copy Ray’s image and my report to my iPod. Later, when Ed paid me, I could copy the iPod contents to Ed’s office computer. I started copying, but like every other part of the examination process, it would take a while. It was a good time to have lunch so I headed for the kitchen.

Again, I sautéed some onions and peppers but this time covered them with Tofurkey Brand Philly Cheese Steak, a steakless steak, and American cheese. Once the cheese melted, I put the pile on a roll and headed out to the pool to eat my lunch.

When I lay down on the chaise with my sandwich, I could smell the hibiscus and citrus trees in the yard. So many trees and bushes grew in the yard, you couldn’t see much of the fence surrounding the property. Birds chirped and sang and the water in the pool rippled from the pump action of the pool filter. Boy, what a treat. I retired here just so I could do stuff like this.

Done with lunch, I checked on my disk copying and found it completed. At this point, back in my old lab, I would have locked up the notebook and disk drive in a safe, but again since I wasn’t working, I didn’t have a safe. When I thought about it, I didn’t think it would be a problem. I keep my house locked and this examination was just to locate assets.

The job finished, it was time to notify Ed and collect my fee. I called his office and got no answer. I called his cell phone. Again, no reply. A few minutes later, I tried both again. When I got no answers this time, I left messages at each number telling him I finished examining the notebook.

I had time to kill. It was 76 degrees out and I had a new iPod to take for a run. I put on my trunks, a T-shirt and sandals, grabbed a towel and a water bottle, and left for the beach. When I got to the end of the block, I crossed route A1A, and then the dune crossover to the sand. It was low tide so the beach was wide enough I could run in the surf without dodging the vehicles driving on the sand.

I dropped my sandals and T-shirt in a heap with my towel and water bottle. George Thorogood and the Delaware Destroyers roared to life on my new iPod. They played great running music with a good solid beat. When George started singing advice to “Get a haircut and get a real job”, I took off and ran south. I started on the part of the beach where they allow vehicles on the sand, passed Chases on the Beach, a Bar-Restaurant where they’ll serve you drinks in their in ground pool and came to the 27th avenue beach ramp. This is the southernmost point on the beach where you can drive on the sand. Then, the absence of cars makes it easier to run. I wouldn’t have to pay attention to avoid being an accident victim.

I ran barefoot, dashing into the surf whenever I got too hot. My mind wandered as I ran and I realized it was a lot more fun examining Ray’s notebook than I thought it would be.

Since I had only one case to do without the pressure of a full-time workload, I was able to enjoy the hunt for answers. I liked figuring things out. I’m hopeless in that I always wants to know the answer to the question why.

Others have noticed this tendency. One year at an office holiday party, Santa Claus read out a list of holiday wishes for all the staff. He granted me, “Complete understanding.” My first reaction at the time was, “What does he mean by that?”

I completed the first two miles in 17 minutes and then ran a little longer to make it an even 20 before turning back. I finished the total run in about 40 minutes. I said I ran. I never said I was fast. After a dip in the ocean to cool off, I sat on the sand for a few minutes to rest while I finished off the pint of water.

Falafel Jones was named for a Mediterranean sandwich Mom craved while pregnant. While this name may have been a burden growing up, it provided a distinction from all of the other Joneses in town. In fact, things could have been worse. Ask Falafel’s brother, a construction worker named Sweet Pickles.